The Heartache of Houseparenting

It’s 9/11 and I have spent the day in Washington DC walking around and seeing as many of the legendary monuments as I could. I’m tired, my feet hurt, and I’m a bit bummed out. My wife and I were going through the Holocoast Museum when I got a call from  one of the girls who will be leaving the children’s home, and knowing how things go in this business, I’m just not sure if I will ever get to see her again. 
Houseparents are as different as the children that they attempt to care for. We all try to connect with the children; some we do others we don’t, and once in a while there’s a bond equivalent to that of our own biological children. And just like my own children some will make some bad choices. Perhaps too many bad choices. 

Well I lost one like that today, and my heart is breaking. We had to say good bye on the phone instead of in person. I’m wondering now if a seed has been planted and nourished enough in that young girls heart enough so that it will grow and flourish. Will she learn from her bad decisions and change or will she continue down the wrong road making bad decisions that will be more and more permanent. 

I can’t help but think of another little girl that I watched grow up. I tried my best to be a mentor to her as well, after all she was my niece and even though she did such heartbreaking and maddening things, I still loved her. She’s not little anymore. She’s a momma now, but she can’t raise the child because she is in confinement. She as multip felonies on her and such a bad drug addiction that I wonder if there is any hope of a future. 

It’s a heartache that keeps me trying. Some you win; some you loose, but I must keep trying. 

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About Ken Sayers

I'm currently employed by a children's home where my wife and I care for a cottage of girls who have been displaced from their families. I'm a middle age man with two grown children of my own and one grandchild. I have worked as a United States Marine, a youth minister, a preacher, a childcare worker, and a truck driver. My hobbies include photography, horses, playing guitar, writing, and fitness.
This entry was posted in Houseparenting, Life Lessons, parenting, Travel. Bookmark the permalink.

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